Well it started at check in when the General Manager of the hotel started picking his teeth with my ID in front of my God given eyeballs. The hilarity continued once I entered my room, cigarette burns in the mattress and blankets, razor thin pillows and a showed that looks like Hostel and Saw had a love child that someone subsequently microwaved.
It gets better.
The closet was missing an doorknob, that isn't a typo, there were clearly two knob fittings, one was well appointed, the other was a haggard mass of splintered wood. For a moment I thought this was a Resident Evil puzzle that I had to complete in order to unlock my actual room.
It was not.
Between the thin (dirty) pillows, cigarette burns and the overall horror movie chic. This was an unforgettable experience, I'm certain my doctor will agree once the eggs hatch.
It's this traveler's opinion (As I write this from a hospital bed, shame on me for touching that countertop barehanded anyway,) that a much more comfortable alternative accommodation can be found out back with Fred, the requisite Parking Lot Hobo (TM)
